Omeboy - Posted - 07/23/2018:  07:17:01

Dressed in his shiny, new super-hero outfit, Ralph kissed his hamster good-bye, swallowed a whole bottle of Viagra and zoomed off to fight for truth, justice and the 'Merican way. We can all sleep easy now.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/23/2018:  11:34:25

Mamas, tell your babies, not to do what I have done...

Omeboy - Posted - 07/23/2018:  13:45:29

"Wow!!! I feel like a new man!!! I'm sure glad I started rhinoceros hormone therapy."

OM45GE - Posted - 07/23/2018:  15:35:34

The same thing happened to Mr. Bean when he tried to paint a room with explosives

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/23/2018:  15:51:16

lost the sidecar carrying his wife

OM45GE - Posted - 07/23/2018:  15:56:24

Thinking of putting his wife in a sidecar

Omeboy - Posted - 07/23/2018:  16:59:37

"Okay, I'm done kidd'en around. Let's see just how good this new crash helmet really is!!!"

OM45GE - Posted - 07/24/2018:  03:37:51

Crash helmet? I don’t wear no stinkin’ crash helmet

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/24/2018:  04:02:25

This new Speedo is the latest in crash suit technology. Has seven air bags that deploy in minutes.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/24/2018:  04:09:58

Thinks duck, duck, duck, goose is just silly

banjoscotty - Posted - 07/24/2018:  04:34:27

Hasn't seen another vehicle or person is many days.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/24/2018:  05:17:54

Waiting for his guitar tech to bring him a cable

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/24/2018:  08:39:59

lost his brake cable

OM45GE - Posted - 07/24/2018:  10:02:23

Of course I’m serious about our relationship, I tattooed your name on my back didn’t I? It’s under the M’s.

Omeboy - Posted - 07/24/2018:  12:44:22

Ralph had planned on staying home. Then he heard the four little words that always warmed his heart: "Free Beer & Free Buffet."

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/24/2018:  14:48:28

Your brain after 72 hours of straight banjo music.

banjoscotty - Posted - 07/25/2018:  03:21:03

Your eyes after the same 72 hours.

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/25/2018:  03:55:34

Thinks chairs are for wussies.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/25/2018:  05:24:10

Has never been thought of as a wussie

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/25/2018:  07:36:37

trying to show off to the desert-dwelling hussies

banjoscotty - Posted - 07/25/2018:  07:55:53

looks like Bud Abbott

BanjerGal - Posted - 07/25/2018:  08:14:04

This IS my idea of "riding the rails".

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/25/2018:  10:56:50

my tinnitus is killing me today

OM45GE - Posted - 07/25/2018:  11:36:55

I'm writing you a check for $150,000 in return for an agreement not to discuss our affair with anyone.

Omeboy - Posted - 07/25/2018:  14:11:05

Him: "You know, Honey. Every time I look in the mirror all I see is a dried-up old has-been who's over-weight, worn out and prematurely old."

Her: "Welllllll, Sweetheart.  At least your eyesight is still good."

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/25/2018:  14:14:46

Starts grass fires without a magnifying lens

OM45GE - Posted - 07/25/2018:  18:20:46

Him: "You know, Honey. Every time I look in the mirror all I see is a dried-up old has-been who's over-weight, worn out and prematurely old."

Her: "Welllllll, Sweetheart.  At least your eyesight is still good."

Omeboy - Posted - 07/25/2018:  18:52:36

Long motorcycle rides gave Ralph a chance to ponder the meaning of life and come to a deeper understanding of things. After yesterday's ride he said: "Do you realize that if Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader, she’d a be “Ella-Vader!”   Man, that's heavy.

Edited by - Omeboy on 07/25/2018 19:01:30

OM45GE - Posted - 07/26/2018:  03:31:51

Doesn’t like to be called two (or four) faced

banjoscotty - Posted - 07/26/2018:  05:15:28

doesn't accept buddy riders

OM45GE - Posted - 07/26/2018:  06:52:49

Someone stole his tip jar

Omeboy - Posted - 07/26/2018:  07:16:30

I haven't seen anything move that fast since Ralphy found out a new Krispy Kreme had just opened.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/26/2018:  07:59:21

The kaleidoscope look started right after I ate a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts by myself

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/26/2018:  08:04:49

likes the back-combed hair look

Omeboy - Posted - 07/26/2018:  12:57:31

Him: "Says here the leading cause of divorce is marriage."

Her: "Does it happen to include homicide?"

OM45GE - Posted - 07/26/2018:  13:26:15

Likes standing out in a crowd

Omeboy - Posted - 07/26/2018:  13:53:22

His old lady said: "Either the Harley goes OR I go." .......I haven't seen him this happy in years.

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/26/2018:  16:34:27

Lost reality many moons ago.

OM45GE - Posted - 07/26/2018:  18:28:06

Almost got kicked out of the swamp for mooning Elmer Fudd

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/26/2018:  18:48:52

Oh great! There's goes my pants.

Omeboy - Posted - 07/26/2018:  19:04:29

Plans to publish one of those gritty "tell-all" books about Porky Pig.

Edited by - Omeboy on 07/26/2018 19:06:23

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/26/2018:  19:06:15

stays in at Halloween ..answers the door to scare little kids

Omeboy - Posted - 07/26/2018:  19:09:29

"Gee, Honey! Did you see this weird story about a creepy guy who stays in Halloween night just so he can scare kids at the door???"

OM45GE - Posted - 07/27/2018:  03:20:50

Rumors about his Halloween activities has him feeling blue

banjoscotty - Posted - 07/27/2018:  03:40:42

"Honey,,I'm going for a short spin",,,,,,,,,,,,,,,(That was 7 months ago)!!

OM45GE - Posted - 07/27/2018:  03:52:53

Trying to remember the words to “1952 Vincent Black Lightning”

Edited by - OM45GE on 07/27/2018 03:53:26

TheLastWord - Posted - 07/27/2018:  04:23:58

Trying to remember why he thought this was a good idea.

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/27/2018:  06:54:25

Trying to remember Daisy's favourite flower

Edited by - chuckv97 on 07/27/2018 06:54:52

OM45GE - Posted - 07/27/2018:  07:05:53

Trying to remember where the back door is