chuckv97 - Posted - 04/24/2022:  21:26:10

Used to work in a steel wool factory,, his foreman made him a toupee

OM45GE - Posted - 04/25/2022:  03:57:22

It’s not that he lacks ambition, he’s just accomplished everything he aspired to

Omeboy - Posted - 04/25/2022:  16:01:57

If you read the top message on this page, he finally apologized to Godzilla for slapping him at the big award show, but ended by saying: "Keep my wife's webbed toes outta your damn mouth!!!"

OM45GE - Posted - 04/25/2022:  17:43:42

Please with the results of the reconstructive surgery

Omeboy - Posted - 04/26/2022:  18:07:29

We now know how he made most of his fortune: his family was in the turtle underwear business.

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/26/2022:  22:02:53

Traded his harp for a banjo and never looked back

OM45GE - Posted - 04/27/2022:  04:09:56

Living in the present

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/27/2022:  22:18:41

Living on the edge

OM45GE - Posted - 04/28/2022:  03:20:29

Reading the fine print

Omeboy - Posted - 04/28/2022:  11:04:45

Live'n the good life-----puts A1 Steak Sauce on every bug he eats.

OM45GE - Posted - 04/29/2022:  03:52:20

Has never met his doppelgänger

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/29/2022:  06:12:27

Never met a bullet he didn’t like

Omeboy - Posted - 04/29/2022:  10:13:26

Finishing up his graduate degree from M.I.T. (The Marsupial Institute for Torpidity)

OM45GE - Posted - 04/29/2022:  11:13:02

My momma said there’d be days like this

Omeboy - Posted - 04/29/2022:  11:17:19

Considers himself to be one of the "founding-fathers" of A.I. (Amphibian Intelligence)

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/29/2022:  12:32:39

Can’t remember the last time he’s had such a belly laugh

OM45GE - Posted - 04/30/2022:  13:46:47

Horrified to learn of invasive pythons prowling the swamp

Omeboy - Posted - 04/30/2022:  19:41:52

A few years back, some aliens landed a space craft near Okefenokee. They came to Earth looking for water. He told them that the Earth was actually hydrated with Gatorade-----not water. "That's why earth is known throughout the galaxies as the "Gatorade Planet!" he told them. "Yeah, you guys take as much as a teacup of this stuff back to your planet and you'll be up to your asses in alligators," he said. They left posthaste.

Edited by - Omeboy on 04/30/2022 19:49:20

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/30/2022:  20:22:09

Often goes to see Delilah the hairdresser who tells him joaks

Omeboy - Posted - 05/01/2022:  20:23:18

He fully intends to write an article for Lethargy Magazine on the art of procrastination, but he keeps putting it off.

OM45GE - Posted - 05/02/2022:  03:02:31

When your blind date goes terribly wrong

Omeboy - Posted - 05/02/2022:  16:45:56

He might be in deep trouble with the IRS. For "dependents," he claimed 10,000 tadpoles !!!!

Edited by - Omeboy on 05/02/2022 16:46:17

OM45GE - Posted - 05/03/2022:  03:35:27

Never cared for duck soup

Omeboy - Posted - 05/03/2022:  09:32:17

He recently spent a lot of tax-payer money to install air conditioners on all his personal lily-pads. But when asked what he's done (as mayor) to help the local fish population----he always flounders.

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/03/2022:  11:19:59

Always laughs at other people’s jokes so that they’ll laugh at his

OM45GE - Posted - 05/03/2022:  14:43:49

Has a very subtle sense of humor

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/03/2022:  22:49:50

Never laughs much, other than watching Kermit the Frog on the swamp community boob tube.

Edited by - chuckv97 on 05/03/2022 22:55:23

OM45GE - Posted - 05/04/2022:  03:18:00

Writing his autobiography but stuck at “I was born in a swamp”

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/06/2022:  06:48:07

Learned the fine art of British dueling at the Royal Amphibious Defence Academy

Omeboy - Posted - 05/06/2022:  09:32:41

In development talks to come out with his signature brand of Sealy Posture-pedic Banjo Stands.

OM45GE - Posted - 05/06/2022:  14:05:39

Thankful his parents didn’t name him “Accordion”

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/06/2022:  14:12:52

A contributor to the 1988 “Swamp Accord”

Omeboy - Posted - 05/06/2022:  14:41:34

A lot of banjo players complain about occasional finger problems. His playing problems are mostly involved with bed sores.

OM45GE - Posted - 05/06/2022:  18:18:19

Not his hat

Omeboy - Posted - 05/09/2022:  14:43:42

After his wife dropped their last batch of tadpoles, he got a protest letter from the Okefenokee General Hospital. They asked him to please stop publically referring to their maternity ward as the "frog factory."

Edited by - Omeboy on 05/09/2022 14:51:42

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/09/2022:  15:10:41

Took a job at a hat factory and went mad

OM45GE - Posted - 05/09/2022:  18:21:58

Doesn’t get mad

Omeboy - Posted - 05/10/2022:  15:25:06

His attorney, Sal Amander, advised him "not to making any moves, try to blend in and keep his big mouth shut." He said he could do the first two easily enough, but with May-fly season right around the corner, there's no way he can keep his mouth shut.

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/10/2022:  15:43:49

Groucho and Zeppo once threw him off the Santa Monica pier

Edited by - chuckv97 on 05/10/2022 15:44:15

Omeboy - Posted - 05/10/2022:  15:50:58

His music teacher told him those funny little squiggle marks in the music are "rests"-----NOT 15 MINUTE "NAPS !!!"

OM45GE - Posted - 05/11/2022:  10:07:30

Madly in love with Margaret Dumont

Omeboy - Posted - 05/11/2022:  10:41:47

He was recently scammed on Ribbitt ---- the romantic social website where frog-guys can meet frog-girls. His leap into love was a bust. Not only did his date NOT look anything like her picture, but she was also made out of plastic !!!

saw_woods - Posted - 05/11/2022:  12:00:36

The kind of guy who laughs at his own jokes, and simultaneously catches flies in his mouth for his supper. With the recent increase in the price of groceries, I may call him up to see if he gives lessons.

Omeboy - Posted - 05/11/2022:  13:43:17

Instead of spanking him when he was a bad kid, his parents would just whack him on the head with the phone book. Unfortunately for him, they were living in Los Angeles at the time.

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/11/2022:  14:47:09

Used to shine shoes for a living, ‘til somebody with a nervous tic kicked him in the mouth

OM45GE - Posted - 05/11/2022:  17:54:34

Looking for loopholes in his contract

Omeboy - Posted - 05/12/2022:  12:33:11

Oh no! He's applied to the Securities and Exchange Commission for an initial public stock offering on all his swamp holdings. If approved, the stock symbol will be FROG (Federated Reptiles & Opossums Group.)

OM45GE - Posted - 05/12/2022:  13:45:33

Nothing under the hat

Omeboy - Posted - 05/12/2022:  14:48:27

Change of plans: The Securities and Exchange Commission told him that "FROG" has already been taken as a stock symbol. So, his new initial public offering will open with stock symbol CROAK (Consolidated Reptiles, Opossums, Alligators & Katydids.)