banjoscotty - Posted - 03/18/2016:  06:38:19

floor doesn't look too good.

But never mind,,they will

OM45GE - Posted - 03/18/2016:  07:26:57

clean it up while the TV network goes to a commercial.

At the same time, the players will

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/18/2016:  09:35:54

drink tallboy Millers and inject growth hormones.

March Madness makes me nervous

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/18/2016:  10:56:24

so please send me some meds.

Never play guitar with your

OM45GE - Posted - 03/18/2016:  13:16:38

hands covered in oil based paint.

It makes it difficult to

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/18/2016:  14:48:06

note the strings correctly.

But if your playing slide guitar you can

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/18/2016:  15:03:46

drive Bill Monroe fans crazy.

Mooning moonshiners in Kentucky

OM45GE - Posted - 03/18/2016:  18:38:14

is a pretty good way to get yourself shot in the ass. 

You might also get

Edited by - OM45GE on 03/18/2016 18:38:35

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/19/2016:  02:37:03

a chance to meet all the girls in the clan.

Even at that,,it's risky to

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/19/2016:  05:38:34

get a rectal examination at Dr. Archie's clinic.

His hammer and tongs

OM45GE - Posted - 03/19/2016:  07:13:22

method is effective but quite controversial in the medical community. 

Most other doctors think

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/19/2016:  07:50:39

That Archie should stay in the comic book.

But Jughead was always the one to

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/19/2016:  11:17:02

make goofy blunders and faux pas.

He couldn't get to first base

OM45GE - Posted - 03/19/2016:  19:13:15

with Veronica Lodge, but he did have his way with Reggie Mantle whenever he wanted. 

Most readers didn't know 

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/20/2016:  14:08:52

that Archie built his car from junkyard parts..

There was a time when Archie and Betty didn't

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/20/2016:  18:43:54

Brylcreem or Ban, but that was before they began visiting Lover's Lane (no relation to Lois Lane).



Archie's jalopy had old shocks

Edited by - chuckv97 on 03/20/2016 18:44:26

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/21/2016:  05:04:08

that didn't work very well.

Do you think the Indians will ever

OM45GE - Posted - 03/21/2016:  06:48:54

leave Cleveland for a larger television market?

Maybe they will

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/21/2016:  07:40:56

merge with the Braves and set up shop in Sioux Lookout, Ontario.

Bending elbows during spring training

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/21/2016:  08:34:13

is a very good way to get the drink to your mouth.

Freddy The Free Loader will

OM45GE - Posted - 03/21/2016:  10:47:02

show up at spring training for the free food.

That is, until they figure out

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/21/2016:  11:00:43

he's a lousy left fielder and holds a .078 lifetime batting average in the Skid Row League.

Too many passengers

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/21/2016:  12:36:46

will overload the boat!!

When using an M-1 Carbine,adjust

OM45GE - Posted - 03/21/2016:  13:03:32

your aim for windage and remember to squeeze the trigger - not yank at it.

It also helps if you

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/21/2016:  13:30:16

put ammo in it.

Santa uses a 12 ga to

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/21/2016:  13:56:00

keep UFO's and rogue drones at bay.

When pluralizing an acronym

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/21/2016:  14:49:25

always walk in single file.

The moose in North Dakota never

OM45GE - Posted - 03/21/2016:  15:38:37

mingle with the moos from Maine.

They think the Maine moose are

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/21/2016:  15:48:00

warped cows that mock them when they "moo".

Maine moose think they're Canadian

OM45GE - Posted - 03/22/2016:  03:20:35

because they don't recognize silly things like humans and their make believe borders. 

They never

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/22/2016:  03:23:45

will be accepted into the Fraternity of The Moose.

That's just one example of

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/22/2016:  07:41:00

blatant prejudice and snobbery.

The Elks Club

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/22/2016:  08:51:35

is worst than the Moose Lodge.

The drunks want to take over the

OM45GE - Posted - 03/23/2016:  03:23:46

lodge and turn it into a brothel. 

Other members think that would

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/23/2016:  06:07:14

be a good project to collect more revenue..

But they want to use their wives for

OM45GE - Posted - 03/23/2016:  07:51:32

some of the ladies of the night positions and other members are turned off my the idea.

There may be a conflict of interest

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/23/2016:  12:03:04

with Sgt. O'Hara ,whose wayward wife has been looking for part time employment.

People have seen his squad car

OM45GE - Posted - 03/24/2016:  03:22:30

parked behind Big Mama's house of ill repute, which the converted Moose lodge would compete with. 

The free market

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/24/2016:  05:35:29

trade for that "product" is NOT free.

They charge by the

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/24/2016:  09:24:41

pound for nails at the general store.

Left handed nails

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/24/2016:  10:12:00

require a left handed hammer.

Not to worry,it's all in

OM45GE - Posted - 03/24/2016:  11:38:22

good fun because I wouldn't live in any house I built.

There is no point in

chuckv97 - Posted - 03/24/2016:  16:47:53

sharpening nails if you're inclined to build a concrete house.

The storal of the mory of the "Three Little Pigs" tale

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/24/2016:  17:29:33

is don't trust OM45GE.

He is a sly

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/25/2016:  02:38:46

and cunning creature.

One time he slinked off into the woods and

OM45GE - Posted - 03/25/2016:  04:34:28

killed two of the three little pigs just for the sport of it all.

He saved the third one for

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/25/2016:  06:37:50

Sunday dinner.

If you ever find yourself in trouble just

OM45GE - Posted - 03/25/2016:  06:45:30

because you were standing in the wrong place at the wrong time?

Like the time I was

banjoscotty - Posted - 03/25/2016:  08:23:07

standing near the girls locker room door and Lulu Martin came charging out!!

Now that there was a sure enough "knock-down"