chuckv97 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  05:53:56

promoted yet on late night TV infomercials.

Perhaps Larry King

OM45GE - Posted - 09/03/2020:  06:11:48

will consider an endorsement deal.

He’ll do almost anything

jacot23 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  06:13:45

to get back in the spotlight.

Personally, I wish he'd just...

OM45GE - Posted - 09/03/2020:  06:15:38

retire while he still has a shred of dignity left.

That may not

jacot23 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  06:37:29

please his last 2 fans though.

I hear they're demanding...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  08:45:45

a DVD of all his interviews with Donnie and Marie Osmond.

There’s a sucker born every minute

xmark - Posted - 09/03/2020:  09:44:38

along with 15 minutes of fame.

Perhaps he should talk to Marie about getting an endorsement deal

OM45GE - Posted - 09/03/2020:  17:32:03

but I suspect she has too much dignity for that.

After all, she

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  18:03:01

has a perennial gig losing weight for her fans.

Donnie, on the other hand,

jacot23 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  19:42:43

is as goofy and untalented as ever.



It might be time to...

Edited by - jacot23 on 09/03/2020 19:42:59

OM45GE - Posted - 09/04/2020:  02:51:22

move on and listen to musicians who actually have some talent.

There are a lot

jacot23 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  04:18:28

of possibilities out there.

Maybe listen to a little...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  04:34:37

tyke play Mary Had a Little Lamb on the piano.

Pianos, however, aren’t easy to carry

OM45GE - Posted - 09/04/2020:  04:44:15

and will need to be retuned when you move them.

However, they are

jacot23 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  04:48:35

easier to play than bagpipes.

Wouldn't the world be a better place if...

OM45GE - Posted - 09/04/2020:  04:56:51

it were a different place.

Perhaps the SETI project

jacot23 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  05:07:04

should be fully funded now.

There are certainly some golks that we should...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  08:35:46

take golfing when they arrive.

My clubs have built-in kryptonite deflectors

jacot23 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  09:23:51

and I got the extended warranty just in case.


Unlike my truck which doesn't have...

OM45GE - Posted - 09/04/2020:  10:20:51

any warranty at all.

Fortunately, it’s quite reliable except

jacot23 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  11:57:45

for the noxious odor that remains after running over that skunk.


No matter what I've tried...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/04/2020:  23:22:51

no dealership will take my truck for a trade-in.

The 20 cans of febreeze I bought

OM45GE - Posted - 09/05/2020:  03:43:50

we’re completely ineffective in spite of their advertising claims.

I’m beginning to think

jacot23 - Posted - 09/06/2020:  05:38:02

I could buy a new car after winning a false advertisement suit.


I’d probably feel guilty though and...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/06/2020:  08:28:03

spill the beans to the awarding committee.

Speaking of beans

jacot23 - Posted - 09/06/2020:  14:51:11

they are a musical fruit and this is a music forum.


Maybe we should form a...

xmark - Posted - 09/06/2020:  19:25:46

band of bean-eating brothers.

We could call ourselves

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/06/2020:  19:28:12

“The Rootin’ Tootin’ Boys”.

Brass players have extra

OM45GE - Posted - 09/07/2020:  04:06:50

good lung capacity.

It enables them

jacot23 - Posted - 09/07/2020:  09:41:02

to hold their breath and wait for the door to pass.

They are the envy of....

OM45GE - Posted - 09/07/2020:  09:48:20

balloon animal artists everywhere.

Their ability to inflate

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/07/2020:  10:07:39

blow-up women is legendary at ribald symphony parties.

Many often descend into

OM45GE - Posted - 09/07/2020:  17:02:52

madness nd start believing the inflatable lasses are real.

Somehave gone so far as to

jacot23 - Posted - 09/07/2020:  20:31:50

apply for a marriage license.

The crazy thing is

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/07/2020:  22:13:55

the clerk at the licence issuing office was deflated when they arrived.

It seems he

OM45GE - Posted - 09/08/2020:  02:52:23

was not expecting to learn his inflatable girlfriend was cheating on him.

It left him

xmark - Posted - 09/08/2020:  09:45:20

absolutely breathless.

Speaking of blowing things up,

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  09:55:59

I’m ready to blow up my neighbo(u)r’s dog house.

That mutt howls all night

OM45GE - Posted - 09/08/2020:  12:07:29

and barks his fool head off at anything that moves.

My neighbor is a complete

jacot23 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  13:12:13

gentleman.


He has offered to...

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  13:44:17

drive my wife to the Sunset Motel.

She’s been

jacot23 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  13:53:45

wanting to go there for a while.


Something tells me...

OM45GE - Posted - 09/08/2020:  15:23:09

I’m not going to be invited along.

I’ll have to

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  16:25:06

blow up my inflatable woman and go to the drive-in movie tonight.

It’s a cheap date

OM45GE - Posted - 09/08/2020:  17:16:30

but the mosquitoes can be ferocious.

The last time I went they

jacot23 - Posted - 09/08/2020:  20:50:52

deflated my date.

Now that's what I'd call a

OM45GE - Posted - 09/09/2020:  04:23:34

letdown.



I was completely

Edited by - OM45GE on 09/09/2020 04:23:52

jacot23 - Posted - 09/09/2020:  09:03:22

clueless as to how to proceed.

Fortunately, the car in the next space saw what happened and

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/09/2020:  09:27:16

reported me to the “Inflatable’Women’R’Us” Society.

Oh the humiliation