OM45GE - Posted - 01/25/2015:  04:58:54

convinced them that the dogs had, in fact, gone to agriculture. 

The farmers decided

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/25/2015:  08:49:03

to start a "4H for Canines Club", not to be confused ,however,with Canadian Club.

Many a good dog

jistgreg - Posted - 01/25/2015:  12:35:24

has returned from Ottawa sadder but wiser. 

If all the disenchanted dogs were laid end to end, 

OM45GE - Posted - 01/25/2015:  14:22:16

they would each get a snout full of dog butt stench. 

The resulting

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/25/2015:  15:28:18

canine mortality would result in a March on Omaha by the Cruelty to Animals Association.

Marlin Perkins

OM45GE - Posted - 01/25/2015:  15:55:39

would have been horrified at the situation. 

How he would have turned it

jistgreg - Posted - 01/25/2015:  18:04:27

to his advantage is the subject of much speculation. 

His chain of pancake houses 

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/25/2015:  21:17:48

stretched from Omaha to Lincoln (remember him?).

But a brouhaha in Omaha

OM45GE - Posted - 01/26/2015:  09:56:43

led to the closure of the restaurants in that fair city.

This caused the residents to

jistgreg - Posted - 01/26/2015:  15:13:05

dine at home with their families. 

The uses to which they put their forks and steak knives 

OM45GE - Posted - 01/26/2015:  16:01:36

we're quite creative. 

Thy used the forks as

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/26/2015:  18:47:04

symbols of an important turning point in their lives,and the steak knives as the bitter pills of disappointment and defeat.

A weary pilgrim

OM45GE - Posted - 01/26/2015:  18:49:28

fell asleep in the middle of the buffet table. 

Much to the consternation 

jistgreg - Posted - 01/26/2015:  19:55:00

of the majordomo, this uninvited guest turned out to be royalty. 

His idea of noblesse oblige 

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/27/2015:  03:45:23

concerning Sin-air-eee-oo's that are true.

Oh,,he just hangs around here hoping that

OM45GE - Posted - 01/27/2015:  05:12:59

someone will discern his royal bloodlines.

So far, however,

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/27/2015:  07:03:56

only the "Dog Catcher" is discerning the situation.

But never fear,I shall

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/27/2015:  07:33:55

get to the bottom of this if it's the last thing I do.

But I didn't

OM45GE - Posted - 01/27/2015:  10:38:26

really intend to sink quite as low as I have.

I'm so low that

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/27/2015:  11:15:32

even Leonard Cohen's albums sound cheerful.

But,as Richard Farina said,

OM45GE - Posted - 01/27/2015:  11:19:02

to Mimi is to love me.

Unfortunately, a motorcycle accident

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/27/2015:  11:25:04

got him looking up,cuz he'd been down so long.

A silver lining

OM45GE - Posted - 01/27/2015:  11:48:09

was the last thing he expected.

So he packed up his sorrows and

jistgreg - Posted - 01/27/2015:  14:21:57

his old kit bag and smiled, smiled, smiled. 

It's a long way to Tipperary 

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/27/2015:  14:45:20

but Al Gore walked through hill and dale to be with the airy,bubbly Tipper.

Blondes always

OM45GE - Posted - 01/27/2015:  15:49:04

have to listen to the same stale old blonde jokes over and over again.

The good news is that they don't remember the punch lines so

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/28/2015:  02:04:38

they wake up like a duck,,in a new world every day.

Johnjacobjingleheimerschmit was a very confused

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/28/2015:  03:35:16

boy in his younger days because his papa told him that a long distinguished name would get him places.

But he soon realized

OM45GE - Posted - 01/28/2015:  04:04:13

that it just made it difficult for him in school.

Try fitting that name on

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/29/2015:  13:32:35

the back of a basketball jersey - it goes right around the front.

However, GeraldinepenelopepatchyDrizzle

OM45GE - Posted - 01/29/2015:  15:37:00

didn't have that problem.

She was not

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/30/2015:  06:58:09

happy with that name so they called her Gerry.

So after that she started

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/30/2015:  12:12:43

frequenting men's haberdasheries, searching for that perfect look.



Her tomboy-ism

Edited by - chuckv97 on 01/30/2015 12:14:27

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/31/2015:  04:02:52

hormones began to moan.

Then one at a time,they began to

OM45GE - Posted - 01/31/2015:  07:03:49

moan in a complex contrapuntal harmony with subtle overtones and an eerie, seductive quality. 

They're thinking of 

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/31/2015:  07:52:16

signing her up for the next Steven King horror flick,as a musical backdrop.

Of course backdrops

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/31/2015:  09:19:38

only drop "backwards".

Frontmen can be only men so she

OM45GE - Posted - 01/31/2015:  09:55:51

stuck in an odd sort of musical limbo. 

She is actually quite good at doing the limbo but

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/31/2015:  17:59:29

OUCHIE,,this time her lim didn't bo.

The Dr.said she

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/31/2015:  19:21:01

had guylumbago, a rare form of limb malfunction ,usually caused by playing too much bubbly champagne music at New Years parties.

Times Square

jistgreg - Posted - 01/31/2015:  19:47:39

was awash in bubbly that fateful New Year's Eve. 

Upon its slippery pavement, 

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/01/2015:  03:12:33

was a river of "puke" and urine.

OH!! That was so vulgar and vile that the police

OM45GE - Posted - 02/01/2015:  07:31:04

decided to stay home and avoid the mess all together. 

This led to 

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/01/2015:  08:07:56

a sit-in at Sgt. O'Hara's precinct station, where ruffians and scalliwags of every description taunted the cops.

The good Sgt.

OM45GE - Posted - 02/01/2015:  09:34:43

O'Hara decided this was a good time for some coffee and donuts. 

So he slipped out the back door and

jistgreg - Posted - 02/01/2015:  13:07:54

slipped on the puke and urine, and quite soiled the seat of his uniform trousers. 

With the call of the coffee and doughnuts loud in his head, 

OM45GE - Posted - 02/01/2015:  13:33:59

he sat in the filth and pondered his next move. 

Should he go back

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/01/2015:  21:23:14

and face ridicule from the unwashed masses, or should he go attend Mass at his parish Church?

Stay tuned

jistgreg - Posted - 02/01/2015:  22:00:19

for "The Cleansing of Sergeant O'Hara of the Fighting 17th" on this channel at a date and time TBA. 

If only there had been a dry cleaners'