OM45GE - Posted - 09/09/2016:  02:27:20

air traffic at Laguardia is difficult to understand. 

Maybe they

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/09/2016:  04:34:42

just let bygones be bygones.

If you're planning a hunting trip always

OM45GE - Posted - 09/09/2016:  05:00:22

remember to pack plenty of clean underwear.

You never know when

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/09/2016:  05:41:57

soiled jockeys might be an animal repellent.

Washing underwear in ice cold creeks

OM45GE - Posted - 09/09/2016:  10:19:35

may be your idea of fun, but I prefer something a little more civilized.

I also like to have

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/09/2016:  18:32:54

a wet bar in my tent, along with a fireplace, and my pipe and slippers.

Jeeves, my butler,

OM45GE - Posted - 09/09/2016:  18:36:55

usually goes ahead and prepares the campsite. 

He's excellent at

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/10/2016:  02:04:18

parking my 40 foot motor home on the 300x500 camp site.

Jeeves never complains about

OM45GE - Posted - 09/10/2016:  04:40:33

catering to my every whim, no matter how trivial or inane. 

He doesn't even mind

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/10/2016:  14:23:45

washing my underwear in ice cold creeks, saying it builds character.

The only reason he stays

OM45GE - Posted - 09/10/2016:  19:33:10

is the exorbitant salary I pay him and the photos in my safe deposit box. 

Several times he has asked me

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/10/2016:  19:43:22

to dispose of those photos, since they put him in a compromosing position.

But my Daddy always told me

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/11/2016:  02:29:42

"son,,when ya gott'um by the hair,,Keep'um there".

But Clementine Greechy said never

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/11/2016:  09:57:00

look a gift horse in the mouth.

She did one time and

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/13/2016:  01:33:30

the horse bit her nose off..

That was only a

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/13/2016:  06:53:35

good thing because her shnoz looked like a big gnarly carrot.

Her spastic surgeon

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/14/2016:  03:06:04

was a drunkard.

The only thing he

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/14/2016:  21:49:59

operated on was the cork in a wine bottle.

Never trust a surgeon

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2016:  02:57:53

who asks you who your malpractice claims attorney is. 

That may indicate 

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/15/2016:  03:51:59

a bit of interest on his part.

Shooting prairie dogs in North Dakota is

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2016:  06:04:11

is big business, with guide companies and equipment sales bringing in lots of revenue. 

Some people prefer

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/15/2016:  10:43:30

to catch them with a fly rod, but patience often runs thin.

Catfish and prairie dogs

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2016:  13:04:07

are both much maligned and unloved creatures.

However, their mothers

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/16/2016:  06:22:30

also had a mother.

That in itself was

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/16/2016:  07:29:30

amazing, since it often rains cats and dogs on the prairie.

With more scientific research

OM45GE - Posted - 09/16/2016:  20:40:08

we have been able to determine that there is no sentient life on Earth. 

Of course, that makes one ask,

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/16/2016:  21:12:11

"why do Red Sox fans sing a song written by a New Yorker during the 7th inning stretch?"

Most Yankee fans

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/17/2016:  03:40:16

get drunk and don't know who they're rooting for anyway..

It's much easier to

OM45GE - Posted - 09/17/2016:  05:30:25

support a team who wins regularly. 

However, a real fan

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/17/2016:  06:12:47

will live and die with the team"s fortunes, padding the owner's pockets.

A field of dreams

OM45GE - Posted - 09/17/2016:  09:50:07

is an illusion created by well paid marketers entrusted to further enrich billionaire team owners. 

Working class fans

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/17/2016:  15:25:05

are the true blue fans, but can only afford to look through a knothole in the outfield fence.

Homers hit over the fence

OM45GE - Posted - 09/17/2016:  19:08:00

occasionally break windshields out on Yawkey way. 

Lots of folks park there without realizing

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/18/2016:  03:30:53

they could turn the car around thus saving windshield damage.

The invention of the automobile brought with it a

OM45GE - Posted - 09/18/2016:  04:50:04

complete change in how horses were used. 

That meant

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/18/2016:  14:37:39

oats were fermented into alkeehawl and poured into automobile fuel tanks.

Horses ate molasses and alfalfa

OM45GE - Posted - 09/18/2016:  17:20:20

and produced copious quantities of flatulence. 

If they could only figure out 

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/18/2016:  20:19:55

how to bottle those explosive gases Exxon would be howling foul.

Last night I was counting sheep

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/19/2016:  02:32:34

and started on my second million,,,I gave up on the first million.

It's hard to count sheep on a cattle ranch because

OM45GE - Posted - 09/19/2016:  02:40:26

the cattle chase the sheep off the pastures. 

I don't know why they

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/19/2016:  05:44:16

tell me to go here, when I could've gone there.

Some indecisive people

OM45GE - Posted - 09/19/2016:  06:05:45

flip coins, others just don't decide anything.

Personally, I like to

banjoscotty - Posted - 09/20/2016:  04:10:27

do things instantly.

Like go fishing in the rain or

OM45GE - Posted - 09/20/2016:  05:14:29

post Instagram messages to my adoring fans.

My last post was

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/20/2016:  09:03:21

made out of rotten poplar and all the cows got out.

Horace Claudhopper came by

OM45GE - Posted - 09/20/2016:  11:30:15

and couldn't resist giving some unsolicited and unwanted advice.

About the third time he said, "If you had asked me", I lost my patience and

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/20/2016:  13:37:08

beat him like a rented mule.

He then corrected my form and technique

OM45GE - Posted - 09/20/2016:  13:38:19

and told me even rented mules deserved respect.

That made me beat him again, but

MWBailey - Posted - 09/20/2016:  21:12:58

He was plainly enjoying it, so I stopped.

Sometimes I get really flustered when people stare at my