KyBanjo - Posted - 11/14/2022:  16:18:07

you see was all turned by me.

I really had to

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/15/2022:  08:56:32

think about what I should drink.

The decision was made

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/15/2022:  10:55:06

by Mary the maid.

She often stayed late

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/15/2022:  15:58:12

waiting by the gate while hoping for a date.



A dashing young man

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 11/15/2022 15:59:01

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/15/2022:  17:35:24

pulled up beside her in a nice convertible with the top down.

She immediately

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/15/2022:  17:44:01

spit in his face and sprayed him with mace.

He was an old suitor

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/16/2022:  09:53:54

and really didn't care for her actions.

However he

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/16/2022:  11:36:13

put up his top, told her to kiss his grits and sped away.

The policeman

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/16/2022:  11:46:04

woke up from the squealing tires.

He gave chase

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/16/2022:  12:39:16

but was outrun as his car really had some horsepower.

Seems like

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/16/2022:  16:29:19

everyone uses credit cards to pay for just about anything and everything theses days.

I remember

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/16/2022:  16:33:05

when a penny would buy you 3 jawbreakers that turned different colo(u)rs when you sucked them.

My sucking days are over

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/16/2022:  16:41:48

unless your referring to my accordion playing.



It seems

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 11/16/2022 16:42:11

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/17/2022:  15:05:00

to never get any better no matter how much I practice, it gets depressing.

It also

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/17/2022:  18:35:50

drove my wife away to her mother’s.

But now her Dad has taken up the banjo

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/18/2022:  04:33:32

so she’s in limbo driving between the two houses.

Maybe she should consider

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/18/2022:  14:24:36

learning one or the other so she would at least fit in.

Then they

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/18/2022:  15:30:05

could start up a musical group and have fun.

It was so hot outside

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/18/2022:  16:10:17

I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking.

The dog catcher, Rufus Rutherford, sweat bullets

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/20/2022:  16:24:44

when dogs chase him.

Always remember

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/20/2022:  18:28:00

to do up your fly before entering Jimmy’s Lunch.

If you don’t, the flies

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/23/2022:  09:24:32

from Jimmy’s dumpster, and maybe the Barflies from Grim Jim’s next door will infest your skivvies.

That could

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/25/2022:  15:07:09

cause several issues for each establishment to get things back in order.

Once they

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/25/2022:  16:43:32

“off” Sidney Snard, the Health Inspector, and stuff his sorry carcass in a dumpster behind Tiny’s Pool Hall, they’ll carry on business as usual.

Tiny and his henchmen

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/26/2022:  08:17:25

have recently discovered their feminine side.

It’s

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/27/2022:  13:17:55

rather funny looking at them with make-up on as well as their shorty shorts this time of year.

Someone once said

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/27/2022:  13:47:08

you can’t tell the girls from the boys.

I’d like to differ

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/27/2022:  15:05:19

from the norm so I now wear a kilt.

I don’t

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/28/2022:  11:05:23

go out if the temps dip below 32*F.

My SO doesn’t fancy

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/28/2022:  14:20:34

playing Lawn Darts since she was accidentally stabbed in the eye.

Sometimes

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/28/2022:  22:19:43

I put her glass eye in my beer at Grim Jim’s when I go to the indoor outhouse so nobody else will drink it.

She always yells

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/29/2022:  03:45:17

, yelps, and yodels during sex.

Her favorite

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/29/2022:  10:22:14

time of the day is anytime she gets to yodel for hours on end.

You would think

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/29/2022:  13:23:45

a Saint Bernard would have better sense than to roam the Swiss Alps looking for stranded skiers.

It’s rumoured that the small keg around their necks

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/29/2022:  14:44:02

contain some very old bourbon guaranteed to warm anyone up.

Sadly it is rumored

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/30/2022:  15:32:33

that all bluegrass bands will now be required to include accordion players.

I don’t

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/30/2022:  16:39:21

believe any accordionist can play Foggy Mountain Chimes with any authenticity.



However, Earl played “ Polka On The Banjo”

Edited by - chuckv97 on 11/30/2022 16:39:58

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/01/2022:  04:27:58

when required.

Sometimes

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/01/2022:  09:20:31

it was requested by the Polish crowd.

It always

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/01/2022:  13:52:02

the voluptuous Polish girls with hairy bowed legs that get all he boys.

I’ll bet

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/01/2022:  14:38:42

they know some “tricks-of-the-trade”.

Pole dancers

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/01/2022:  15:14:38

seem to know all the tricks of the trade including how to get humongous tips from the crowd.

It ended up costing me

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/01/2022:  16:59:54

a complete arm and part of a leg when I fell into the tree branch chipper.

It’s always

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/01/2022:  21:42:54

happens when we get tree trimming jobs in Fargo.

This leaves me with one option - busking with my harmonica

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/02/2022:  06:10:55

.

Lately

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/02/2022:  08:50:27

my lips have been very chapped causing me to be out of tune.

The doctor told me

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/02/2022:  20:37:13

I’ll be lipless in 3 months.

I’ll be saving money on ChapStick

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/03/2022:  09:30:27

at least.

I can now

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/03/2022:  12:46:57

walk and chew gum at the same time.

Counting backwards