chuckv97 - Posted - 04/26/2020:  16:55:06

went to help Father McKenzie darn his socks in the night.

They were careful not to say “darn”

OM45GE - Posted - 04/27/2020:  04:20:25

and not something more risqué.

Little did they know that Father McKenzie swore like

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/27/2020:  08:23:51

an old salty sailor.

Their were words that I had never heard the like of

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/27/2020:  09:24:01

except at gluebrass festivals when 20 RV generators started up near a hot jam.

I’m staying six feet

OM45GE - Posted - 04/27/2020:  09:50:21

away from everyone except my new neighbor who is incredibly attractive.

I've decided it's worth

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/27/2020:  18:57:12

getting kicked out of the RV community as there is just no privacy.

The folks next door where in their 90's and only wore a

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/27/2020:  19:53:34

fig leaf to cover their private parts.

Their meds

OM45GE - Posted - 04/28/2020:  03:52:14

were clearly interacting with each other in unexpected ways.

All those adverse event warnings were

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/28/2020:  09:54:56

not adhered to at all, they never listen to me.

And with that attitude they will all be shipped to

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/28/2020:  11:38:19

the rust belt in Cleveland and Buffalo.

There they can shovel “lake-effect” snow

OM45GE - Posted - 04/28/2020:  13:59:53

until mid-June or early July.

Personally, I don't see the

5B-Ranch - Posted - 04/28/2020:  14:45:26

the attraction of a pet fish.

Never come when you call them and

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/28/2020:  16:51:16

they don’t warn you when you’re being burgled.

Sometimes they even die on you

OldBlindGuy - Posted - 04/28/2020:  17:02:56

when you take them for a walk around the block.

The neighborhood cats are always

OM45GE - Posted - 04/29/2020:  03:39:32

lurking around outside the back door which gives them a view of my fish tank.

The hopeful looks they

5B-Ranch - Posted - 04/29/2020:  15:57:00

emote when one of your guppies or goldfish go belly up.

But anyway yesterday

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/29/2020:  16:26:47

three catfish chased away a dogfish shark.

Boy, am I glad

5B-Ranch - Posted - 04/29/2020:  17:17:11

Sharknado is just make believe.

Or is it

OM45GE - Posted - 04/29/2020:  17:26:25

, that is the question.

If you can answer that, you probably

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/29/2020:  17:57:38

should phone Alex Trebek before he croaks.

Please talk to him in question form

OM45GE - Posted - 04/30/2020:  03:22:55

lest he look at you with that pained superior expression.

My favorite category is

banjoscotty - Posted - 04/30/2020:  05:37:27

older women.

But I can find time for

OM45GE - Posted - 04/30/2020:  06:55:29

women of any age.

Unfortunately, they don't find

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/30/2020:  07:44:54

time or patience with me.

I asked one how my banjo playing sounded

OM45GE - Posted - 04/30/2020:  17:37:17

and she didn't have the courtesy to stop screaming long enough to answer me.

Not only that, she

KyBanjo - Posted - 05/01/2020:  21:47:53

called the police on me.

When they arrived I immediately went into a

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/01/2020:  21:51:35

song and dance about being abducted by Martians and that I havent been the same since.

Officer Obie said, “You too?

OM45GE - Posted - 05/02/2020:  04:48:52

, pulled out his phone and started scrolling through his thousands of photos.

Several hours later, I

KyBanjo - Posted - 05/02/2020:  06:27:03

found ole Obie lay passed out naked in his cruiser.

When he came to he said the aliens had

OM45GE - Posted - 05/02/2020:  10:47:16

abducted him and ordained him as the supreme rule of Earth.

He then told me to

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/02/2020:  10:53:41

bury the hatchet and shine his boots.

I spat on those boots

OM45GE - Posted - 05/02/2020:  10:54:47

thinking he would appreciate a genuine spit shine.

Unfortunately, he

KyBanjo - Posted - 05/02/2020:  11:42:22

did not, in fact it down right infuriated him.

Poor ole Obie finally showed his

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/02/2020:  16:54:02

true colo(u)rs when his Captain arrived.

He began whimpering like a fool

OM45GE - Posted - 05/03/2020:  16:55:53

and muttering something about somebody moving the keys.

Nobody knew what the heck

KyBanjo - Posted - 05/05/2020:  08:22:21

he was talking about as he just lost it finally.

Obie ended up in the asylum for a bit and was

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/05/2020:  08:58:16

hounded by a rich old dame who’d gone senile.

She said she liked a man in uniform

OM45GE - Posted - 05/05/2020:  12:17:18

so Obie “borrowed” a nurse’s uniform and wore it every day.

He really looked like

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/06/2020:  21:44:03

a cop wearing a nurse’s uniform.

Of course, this bit of nonsense

OM45GE - Posted - 05/07/2020:  04:33:58

was only a diversion from the real business at hand.

Obie was desperately trying to

Schuppe66 - Posted - 05/08/2020:  05:27:53

I love to play games

Mountain Dew - Posted - 05/08/2020:  05:49:55

Find Roger Siminoff's banjo setup book.

But, alas he turned to

OM45GE - Posted - 05/08/2020:  06:51:39

a rather dry and academic treatise on the perils of small facility incarceration.

It called into question everything Obie

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/08/2020:  08:27:12

held dear to his heart.

He vowed that if he ever re-entered society

OM45GE - Posted - 05/08/2020:  09:19:30

he would try to find a deserted island and move there immediately.

He should have considered

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/10/2020:  15:34:21

Alcatraz since it’s been deserted for years.

He could grow a nice garden

OM45GE - Posted - 05/10/2020:  16:05:31

make a little cash on the side fleecing tourists who visit the island.

There are some

KyBanjo - Posted - 05/12/2020:  06:26:04

folks that pay good money to visit the big house.

Obie got to stay longer than he

chuckv97 - Posted - 05/12/2020:  08:43:19

bargained for.



It seems his Tourette Syndrome

Edited by - chuckv97 on 05/12/2020 08:44:36