OM45GE - Posted - 11/11/2017:  15:52:52

and join the mothers, I was alone for many years.

The mothers mistrusted me and the brothers

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/11/2017:  19:43:22

threatened to disclose my closet skeletons.

So I forgot about Brothers and mothers

OM45GE - Posted - 11/11/2017:  20:19:10

and entered a Mah Jongg tournament.

I’ve been studying

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/11/2017:  20:43:23

the nuances of the game from ancient Chinese scripts.

I go to sleep with tapes playing

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/12/2017:  03:15:08

and that helps the insomnia just a but.

Do you remember what Rip Van Winkle did when

OM45GE - Posted - 11/13/2017:  02:50:36

he got back to town and learned everyone thought he was dead.

Not only that, but

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/13/2017:  03:57:28

his wife had sold the farm and had 3 more children.

So Rip just laid back down and went back to sleep while all of

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/13/2017:  06:18:59

lady friends gathered round with intentions to cut off his stinkin’ beard.

But he jumped up

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/13/2017:  07:16:58

and ran into the nudist colony.

He told them he wasn't a member so

OM45GE - Posted - 11/13/2017:  14:07:42

they asked him to sign a waiver.

He consulted an attorney

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/13/2017:  14:32:59

but she met him at the colony fence demanding a retainer fee.

He could only promise her

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/13/2017:  16:39:37

that he was good for it.

So she led him to an outside

OM45GE - Posted - 11/14/2017:  02:41:33

cabana and proceeded to collect a deposit confirming that he was, indeed, good for it.

This was a legal precedent

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/14/2017:  04:48:58

and required only 35 minutes.

Some procedures use short cuts but that isn't

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/14/2017:  06:42:30

what scissors are for.

Rip eventually got the heave-ho

OM45GE - Posted - 11/14/2017:  12:36:48

when they found out he had been faking the whole sleeping thing.

Turns out he had actually been

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/15/2017:  16:21:54

passed out from a copious volume of hard cider.

Back in the Catskills

OM45GE - Posted - 11/16/2017:  02:57:16

the resorts were doing a booming business.

Tourists were

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/16/2017:  18:59:30

training their cats to skillfully fetch their slippers, like dogs so faithfully do.

What they didn’t count on, however,

OM45GE - Posted - 11/17/2017:  02:58:54

was the gangs the cats would form.

They roamed the resorts

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/17/2017:  07:43:55

and raided all the trash cans.

When Sylvester found out about it he

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/17/2017:  10:52:37

summoned Deputy Dawg to come straighten things out.

Next thing you know

OM45GE - Posted - 11/17/2017:  12:01:47

all of the cartoon characters had decided the weren't getting a big enough piece of the royalty pie and went on strike.

Children around the world were

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/17/2017:  18:43:02

throwing tantrums and upending television sets.

Hanna Barbera and Warner Brothers

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/18/2017:  04:32:02

signed release forms and skipped town.

They went looking for

OM45GE - Posted - 11/18/2017:  08:39:26

a place where they wouldn't be recognized and could spend their fortunes as the wished.

That might not be as

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/18/2017:  10:54:10

easy as you’d think, since Pacific Islands are run by dictators these days.

Maybe an igloo in the Yukon

OM45GE - Posted - 11/20/2017:  03:23:51

would provide a suitable level of anonymity.

The only problem would be

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/20/2017:  08:45:43

keeping out of sight.

I remember one time when my brother

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/20/2017:  10:14:35

hiked across the barrens of Baffin Island.

Five polar bears

OM45GE - Posted - 11/20/2017:  13:09:08

devoured him just fifteen minutes into the hike while dozens of horrified tourists watched.

The video is amazing becuase

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/20/2017:  19:10:14

it wasn't the Baffin Islands.It was southern Ohio.It wasn't 5 Polar bears.
It was two rabbits of which he roasted for supper.

MAN,stories sure can get stared and then

OM45GE - Posted - 11/21/2017:  03:07:21

get more and more unbelievable with every telling.

For example the story of Paul Bunyan started

Edited by - OM45GE on 11/21/2017 03:09:08

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/21/2017:  03:43:25

when he got this bunyan on the side of his foot.

He went to the Dr. and Doc said,,Paul,you

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/21/2017:  06:58:05

and your stinkin’ ox can get out of my office - PRONTO!

Never take an axe into your sawbones’ office

OM45GE - Posted - 11/21/2017:  12:22:25

unless you're prepared to be a named co-defendant in a malpractice lawsuit.

If you need a good malpractice attorney,

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/22/2017:  02:48:57

just pick one at random from the yellow pages.

They're all money hungry and will

OM45GE - Posted - 11/22/2017:  10:24:07

end up taking more of your settlement than you get.

If you lose, the will

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/22/2017:  14:55:14

end up sweeping the floors of their offices til doomsday.

Lying through their teeth

OM45GE - Posted - 11/23/2017:  03:44:10

is easy for ventriloquists.

Which may be why

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/24/2017:  10:25:52

throwing your voice is confusing for fake news reporters.

Quotes are attributed

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/24/2017:  13:37:18

to those that don't know the difference.

Besides that,,anyone can do whatever

OM45GE - Posted - 11/24/2017:  19:24:15

they want if they are amoral.

They could also

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/24/2017:  21:27:35

shine their shoes without removing the shoelaces.

Shoeshine boys and newsboys

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/25/2017:  02:50:41

wonder what happened to Paul Bunyan.

But it really didn't

OM45GE - Posted - 11/25/2017:  04:05:26

stop them from participating in the book club meeting.

This month’s book was

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/25/2017:  12:34:00

“Little Women”, a banned piece of filth of a bygone century.

Hugh Hefner loved it

OM45GE - Posted - 11/25/2017:  16:52:22

and was inspired to use several plot elements in his magazine.

One of them was

banjoscotty - Posted - 11/26/2017:  16:08:03

a portrayal of his wife.

The only thing is she didn't