OM45GE - Posted - 04/20/2021:  13:11:21

had collars and leashes attached to each of them.

I was startled when they started

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/20/2021:  14:49:32

 a buy one get one offering on leeches at Sonny’s bait shop.



Offer is limited

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 04/20/2021 14:51:45

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/20/2021:  14:53:48

to folks who abhor modern medicine and don’t have much luck with quicksilver treatments.

Sonny cured his dog

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/20/2021:  14:56:58

Edna, by giving her a lobotomy.

Now she

OM45GE - Posted - 04/21/2021:  03:39:34

will chase a ball but can’t remember why when she gets it.

She also doesn’t

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/21/2021:  07:58:45

chase our cats anymore, as she is one sorry pooch.

Just last weekend

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/21/2021:  08:01:03

the days on my calendar said “Saturday” and “Sunday”.

My cats roam all night

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/21/2021:  09:01:14

and the dog listens endlessly to Ozzy Osborne howling “Bark At The Moon”.

It’s beginning

OM45GE - Posted - 04/21/2021:  11:00:12

to remind me of my misspent youth.

I don't know where

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/21/2021:  12:21:55

my misplaced stash of Archie and Hot Stuff comic books are.

I did find

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/21/2021:  13:54:39

a dirty PEZ dispenser and a pair of x-Ray glasses.

The pawn shop

OM45GE - Posted - 04/21/2021:  16:15:16

told me I would have to pay them to take the items off my hands.

I didn't understand

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/22/2021:  07:39:21

their reasoning so I gave them the old “HARUMPH” and stormed out.

Speaking of storms

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/22/2021:  11:48:52

, boy didn't it come a gusher last night.

It rained so hard

OM45GE - Posted - 04/22/2021:  12:38:16

fish were swimming past my window.

I hope that doesn’t mean

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/22/2021:  15:48:58

I should build an Ark.

My last Ark

OM45GE - Posted - 04/23/2021:  03:04:14

was a bit of a failure.

Seems I had the plans upside down so it

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/23/2021:  05:51:04

went on record as the first domed stadium.

Once

OM45GE - Posted - 04/23/2021:  06:05:54

isn't necessarily enough.

Sometimes you need

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/23/2021:  07:56:42

a day-long pursuit of debauchery.

Don’t bother phoning me

OM45GE - Posted - 04/23/2021:  10:16:57

unless you are going to offer something constructive.

I've had enough

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/23/2021:  11:47:20

criticism this last week, it really needs to stop.

Just yesterday I was

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/23/2021:  18:20:03

criticized about my crappy banjo playing. 



And then

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 04/23/2021 18:20:35

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/23/2021:  19:06:24

the milkman said my wife told him I’m a lousy lover.

One of these days

OM45GE - Posted - 04/24/2021:  03:48:35

I’m going to catch the two of them stirring the cream.

Then I will

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/24/2021:  10:43:02

secretly take pictures of their steamy rendezvous.

Armed with

OM45GE - Posted - 04/24/2021:  12:52:20

the photographic evidence I’m sure to get a favorable property settlement.

All I really want is

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/24/2021:  13:56:13

my dog, my banjo, and my whip & handcuffs collection.

I can shack up with

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/25/2021:  06:48:05

most anyone.

What I need is

OM45GE - Posted - 04/25/2021:  12:41:03

for someone to give me a chance.

Usually I don’t get

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/25/2021:  12:54:55

much respect from women.

It must have something to do with

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/25/2021:  17:24:06

the fact I’m a Leper and at party’s they sometimes use my back for a chip dip.

One time

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/25/2021:  17:44:29

was enough for me.

If it ever

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/25/2021:  17:55:41

comes to emotional situations, I have a tendency to fall apart.



Not to mention

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 04/25/2021 17:57:04

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/25/2021:  17:57:56

that I cry at night asking for my nanny.

Things will soon

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/25/2021:  18:01:13

open up so I can get my wife out of jail.

They locked her up

OM45GE - Posted - 04/26/2021:  03:35:51

for frightening small children and causing milk to curdle.

I’m not saying she’s ugly, but

banjoscotty - Posted - 04/26/2021:  04:59:39

she is NOT pretty.

So please don't

OM45GE - Posted - 04/26/2021:  05:56:35

make any sarcastic comments when you meet her.

She may react violently

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/26/2021:  08:45:37

and put you in a full nelson.

That’s just for starters

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/26/2021:  15:30:18

as she knows several wrestling moves.

Ask her to show you

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/26/2021:  16:46:20

pictures of her silicone breast enhancement scars.

She

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/26/2021:  16:51:49

told Preacher O’Casey that the Lord helped her through the operation.

The good reverend

OM45GE - Posted - 04/26/2021:  17:40:42

fainted dead away at the mere thought of her pendulous bosom.

He hadn’t seen

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/27/2021:  08:07:40

any since his days at the seminary library art section.

His stash of sacramental wine

OM45GE - Posted - 04/27/2021:  09:04:29

sustained him through life’s many travails.

He spent his days

KyBanjo - Posted - 04/27/2021:  09:21:24

watching the others.



He sometimes

Edited by - KyBanjo on 04/27/2021 09:23:11

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 04/27/2021:  15:52:00

references his collection of Fredricks of Hollywood catalogues while drinking his wine.

Lingerie

chuckv97 - Posted - 04/27/2021:  16:29:41

comes to the back door of the rectory via FedEx.

Sometimes he drives his black Peugeot