Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/01/2021:  16:39:06

common with canines.

They

OM45GE - Posted - 10/01/2021:  16:45:48

don’t see the value in household chores.

Maybe he doesn’t understand

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/01/2021:  22:37:42

cleanliness is next to godliness.

Actually, I don’t understand that either

OM45GE - Posted - 10/02/2021:  03:19:07

since I’ve never seen God while scrubbing the floors or cleaning the toilets.

In fact, I’ve never

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/02/2021:  04:35:07

actually scrubbed the toilets, I just replace them every six months.

My plumber

OM45GE - Posted - 10/02/2021:  06:13:41

likes the business but I suspects he doesn’t really approve.

He’s made little comments like,

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/02/2021:  08:09:25

“Your wife has great hooters”.

Which

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/02/2021:  08:27:33

leads me to comment on his plumber’s crack.

He says he’s going to

OM45GE - Posted - 10/02/2021:  12:58:34

hit the next person who says something like that with a pipe wrench.



The joke is on him because

Edited by - OM45GE on 10/02/2021 12:58:47

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/02/2021:  13:25:02

I hid his pipe wrench in my wife’s underwear drawer.

We’ll see

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/02/2021:  14:02:57

if she finds it and decides to tighten my nuts.

Last year I sang soprano

KyBanjo - Posted - 10/03/2021:  14:48:21

and was promised a spot on the local radio show.

I had to turn it down as

OM45GE - Posted - 10/03/2021:  16:05:24

I was planning to sort my sock drawer that day.

I didn’t really

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/03/2021:  16:31:00

have a destination in mind when I arrived at Reptile Gardens in Rapid City, SD.

It was a long

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/03/2021:  16:33:10

expect a long-lost argyle sock to show up, but I’m glad it’s no longer orphaned.

My galpal darns

OM45GE - Posted - 10/04/2021:  02:52:59

instead of damns but she drops the F-Bomb like confetti.

She takes delight in

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/04/2021:  04:45:40

shocking the church lady next door, who abhors such language.

Her prim and proper ways

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/04/2021:  05:34:11

belie her steaming, volatile, need for complete physical gratification.

She reads

OM45GE - Posted - 10/05/2021:  12:21:41

The Diary of Anais Nin cover to cover obsessively.

I think she’s looking for

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/05/2021:  13:58:11

loose change in the furniture cushions to support her unspoken habits.

Once

OM45GE - Posted - 10/06/2021:  12:44:12

I found my next door neighbor in my couch cushions.

I have no idea

Edited by - OM45GE on 10/06/2021 12:44:26

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/06/2021:  15:46:27

why she was naked.

Maybe she

KyBanjo - Posted - 10/06/2021:  16:31:54

always wanted to just run around naked.

Seems like she

OM45GE - Posted - 10/06/2021:  16:54:28

was taking a fairly big risk in picking my couch.

After all, I

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/06/2021:  16:57:16

just received a new supply of fresh viagara and 45 cans of oysters.

The sex toys shoppe downtown

banjoscotty - Posted - 10/07/2021:  04:09:05

went out of business..

I guess we'll just

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/07/2021:  06:05:55

say “screw it” and make other arrangements.

I wonder

OM45GE - Posted - 10/07/2021:  06:34:58

as I wander, which frequently ends up with me lost.

I can’t

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/07/2021:  08:29:17

seem to understand Einstein’s theories, nor even the correct bridge placement on my banjo.

Pi, slope, and cosine

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/07/2021:  16:30:50

are the names of my brothers and I have a sister who is Parallel.

Dad taught

OM45GE - Posted - 10/07/2021:  17:46:02

calculus.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t very

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/08/2021:  04:38:23

adept a banjo playing, making noise instead of music.

So

OM45GE - Posted - 10/08/2021:  07:59:36

Mom exile him to the chicken coop out back.

However, the chickens

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/08/2021:  10:42:34

went on strike and would not lay a single egg until the offensive disruption was removed.

After

KyBanjo - Posted - 10/08/2021:  11:38:43

such a big hassle they decided chickens were not for them.

They ended up raising

OM45GE - Posted - 10/08/2021:  16:22:10

a white flag of surrender and let the foxes into the henhouse.

That started

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/08/2021:  17:31:52

a protest aggregation by the local “Coyotes’r’Us” chapter.

They demanded a chicken in every

OM45GE - Posted - 10/09/2021:  04:45:31

coyote den and a ban on leg hold traps.

They’ve hired a

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/09/2021:  06:23:25

-n attorney who appears to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Hopefully

OM45GE - Posted - 10/09/2021:  06:26:15

he will be able to help them, but it’s a tall order.

One problem is

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/09/2021:  10:05:39

Judge Hangum in civil court.

He’s often hung over

OM45GE - Posted - 10/09/2021:  12:15:18

and is frequently seen sipping from his engraved silver hip flask.

He claims

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/09/2021:  16:34:51

it’s filled with mineral water but everyone knows it’s real contents.

The smell

chuckv97 - Posted - 10/09/2021:  16:44:40

knocked over frail, old Mrs. Marigold, the court stenographer.

Bailiff Biff Bullwork

OM45GE - Posted - 10/10/2021:  04:52:04

stuck his nose into his armpit.

The stench wasn’t much better, but

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/10/2021:  17:25:24

it was enough delay proceedings until fumigation crews could arrive.

Apparently

OM45GE - Posted - 10/11/2021:  03:00:56

they had considerable experience with this sort of thing.

They acted professionally, but

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 10/11/2021:  04:14:37

deep inside they resented the nature of their assigned task.

Soon

OM45GE - Posted - 10/11/2021:  04:57:05

enough it was time for a coffee break and the workers noisily hustled out of the courtroom.

In the confused silence that followed